a scanner darkly.

If there was any ‘sin’, it was that these people wanted to keep

on having a good time forever, and were punished for that, but,

as I say, I feel that, if so, the punishment was far too great, and I

prefer to think of it only in a Greek or morally neutral way, as mere science,

as deterministic impartial cause-and-effect. I loved them all. Here is the list,

to whom I dedicate my love:

  • To Gaylene deceased
  • To Ray deceased
  • To Francy permanent psychosis
  • To Kathy permanent brain damage
  • To Jim deceased
  • To Val massive permanent brain damage
  • To Nancy permanent psychosis
  • To Joanne permanent brain damage
  • To Maren deceased
  • To Nick deceased
  • To Terry deceased
  • To Dennis deceased
  • To Phil permanent pancreatic damage
  • To Sue permanent vascular damage
  • To Jerri permanent psychosis and vascular damage


…and so forth.


In Memoriam. These were comrades whom I had; there are no better.

They remain in my mind, and the enemy will never be

forgiven. The ‘enemy’ was their mistake in playing. Let them

all play again, in some other way, and let them be happy.


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